


applause

by poppyharris



Series: the only one that brings me joy, is my computer boy [8]
Category: Columbine - Fandom
Genre: F/M, anniversaries of things that you'd rather forget, death of a sibling, media bad too, nor did depression or any mental health issues, ptsd didn't exist in the 90s as we all know, video games bad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-24
Updated: 2020-11-24
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:49:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 735
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27697874
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/poppyharris/pseuds/poppyharris
Summary: poppy doesn't know how to cope, neither does kevin.
Relationships: Dylan Klebold/Original Female Character(s) (mentioned), Kevin Harris (b.1978)/Original Female Character(s)
Series: the only one that brings me joy, is my computer boy [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2030974





	applause

**Author's Note:**

> kevin harris is more attractive than byron klebold don't mf @ me

“nothing makes me happy anymore,” poppy whispered, her legs drawn to her chest. it’d been two years ago, and kevin felt a little put out when his father attempted to forbid him to return to littleton.

he’d waited until the dead of night to lay his flowers, one bouquet at every cross. but eric’s was long gone, used for kindling. he couldn’t think of another place to go, but ended up at blackjack’s.

and there poppy had been, on the wall opposite, staring into the strangely sterile pizzeria. a new blank-eyed teen manned the counter, acne covered and deeply unhygienic. kevin knew what she’d felt, seeing another take his place. 

they’d sat in silence together, presumably looking an odd sight. kevin was still in uniform, his shoes just as highly polished as his singular medal. poppy looked… tired. he couldn’t think of another word. deep, dark bags under her eyes clashed horribly with her pale skin, deep scratches on her neck and a sullen expression told him she was suffering just as badly as him.

“i threw a grenade at a pile of spare tyres and cried,” kevin responded, staring down at his shiny shoes, his own reflection mocking him.

“i can’t have the television on when i go to sleep anymore, it makes me think i’m back on that day,” poppy put her head in her hands, her hair covering any glimpse kevin could’ve hoped to see of her.

the silence settled again, and the lights at blackjack’s went off. the teen left, in a beat up pick up, and the night air became still. no birds would come this close to the city, leaving nothing but the sound of cars in the distance.

he wasn’t sure how long they sat there. saying nothing, listening to the wind gently pass through the trees. a car rocked by tacos selene, the muffled moans and fogged windows making kevin realise how little columbine meant to others.

in the same way kevin couldn’t quite understand what poppy was going through, no one knew what both of them had experienced. they’d been betrayed by someone they loved, and that person was never coming back. poppy suddenly looked up at him, staring at his medal.

“what’d they give that to you for?” she asked, narrowing her eyes at the medal. 

“nepal, it’s where i did my first proper duty,” kevin mumbled, running his fingers over the medal. he’d killed others, just like eric. he was so much like him, deep down. not even that deep down. here they were, april 2001, and nothing had changed in the world. china was just being aggressive as always, it was going to die out, and their attention would be diverted.

that was war. that was always war. but kevin couldn’t help but think he was fighting another war. inside his head. words had been thrown around about eric, from sociopath to angry virgin. kevin was so scared that he was going to end up like him.

everyone blamed wayne. eric blamed wayne, poppy had kept giving him dirty looks during the commission hearings. kevin knew wayne blamed her, so did her father. 37% of denver post readers did too. and yet, she wouldn’t leave littleton.

poppy’s father might’ve abandoned her, but she continued to live in the house that was bought for her. just down the hill from dylan’s, it was the smallest house around the buckhorn cul-de-sac. he saw it on the news, the cameras camped on her front lawn when she finally returned home. 

“how about you come home with me?” 

kevin didn’t know what made him say it. her shocked reaction and sudden look away made him regret saying it. but she put her hand on his, and nodded very slowly.

“8276?” poppy whispered, suddenly looking incredibly fearful at the thought of going back to the harris residence. kevin realised he’d never asked if she’d ever been, it was probably somewhere in the report. he just couldn’t face what eric did.

“no, it’s my grandma’s old place on the terraces,” kevin gave her hand a squeeze, feeling how frail she was for the first time. her hands shook, and her skin felt rough. poppy was so tense, and flinched slightly whenever kevin smoothed his thumb over the back of her hand.

she looked at the empty pizzeria, then at kevin. out with the old murderer, in with the new.

**Author's Note:**

> song: applause - lady gaga


End file.
